Culture is a valuable part of one’s identity. Culture can be defined as all the ways of life including arts, beliefs, and institutions of a population that are passed down through generations. Culture has been known as the “way of life for a society”. It includes rules and codes of conduct, manners, dress, language, rituals, religion, etc (LaMorte).
Legacy burdens are beliefs, feelings, and emotions that are handed down through the family line either directly or even indirectly (Gardner). These beliefs can turn into burdens if they are tied to shame. Sometimes legacy burdens only go back one generation, but some can even go back to hundreds of years of past cultural traditions. This pressure to conform can allow one’s mental health to deteriorate. It can create inner conflict as one navigates between honoring familial traditions and creating an individual identity.
As a South Indian, culture is a valuable and very prevalent aspect of my life; my parents are quite religious Hindus, so I feel the need to constantly fit in their footsteps. Especially in terms of culture, I am expected to pray every morning and follow various rituals and traditions that are deeply rooted in our heritage. Growing up in a household where religion and culture are central can indeed create a strong influence on personal practices and beliefs. It’s natural to feel the weight of expectations to follow in the footsteps of your parents, particularly when it comes to religious observances.
Several times, I have been asked by my relatives in India whether or not I am still complying with all these traditions; most of the time I am, but after these visits to India, I feel pressured to conform and be the perfect, most culturally accepted person.
However, these constant expectations can become very burdensome; they can even make you feel trapped. For many individuals like myself, raised in households where culture and religion hold significant sway, the pressure to conform can feel overwhelming. This might seem like a rigid framework placed upon you, but don’t worry. There are ways to break free from this and come to terms with your identity.
Ultimately, while culture is an important part of one’s identity and provides a rich framework of customs and beliefs, it shouldn’t become a source of confinement, stress, or anxiety. Embracing your cultural heritage should be your choice; culture should never be forced upon someone. You have to stay true to yourself.
If your culture feels weighty on you, here are some ways you can receive help.
- Speak up: Most of the time, your family is willing to listen to you. You can express your approach and appreciation for your culture while also telling them things you believe you want to do differently. This is how I managed to escape my stressful cultural expectations, especially those I didn’t personally connect with,
- Seeking support outside of the familial circle: Whether through friends who share similar experiences or mentors who can provide guidance, finding a supportive community can offer validation and encouragement.
- Setting boundaries: Understand that it is okay to establish limits on how much you participate in certain cultural practices or traditions, especially if they feel conflicting. Do not pressure yourself!
- Explore and learn about other cultures: this can be enlightening! Engaging in multicultural experiences can broaden your perspective and help you appreciate diversity.
Written By: Siri Munnuluri, Mental H2O Youth Resource Writer
Cites used:
https://ifs-institute.com/news-events/events/working-cultural-legacy-burdens
